To All the Friends I Used to Talk to All the Time:
Let’s face it. When we were in grade school and high school, everything was so much easier. I literally see you after every two to three subjects. I could even see you beforehand. All we had to do was sneak a text message. We used to meet in between classes and talk about how boring the class was, how funny our teachers looked or about our small problems that we used to cry about. But we grew up – we don’t go to the same school, we don’t even live in the same country and we are more mature now.
We meet sometimes, but we have our awkward moments. We talk sometimes, but our conversations no longer last as long as they used to. I feel like our interests and personalities changed as we grew older through the years. Don’t get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. In fact, I can only be glad and happy for one another that we’re growing up. But we also can’t disregard the fact that it’s changing us. We can no longer talk about our stuffed toys, autograph notebooks, TV shows or diaries. And you know what, to be honest with you, I don’t even know what to say when I see you. Sometimes, i get nervous before I meet you. I think about all the things we can possibly talk about. Yes, i’m very much curious as to how you have been the past few years or months. I’m very much curious as to who and where you are now. I am interested as to where you want to be ten years down the line. But once i’m seated next to you, I feel like i’m presenting in front of a bunch of people – I literally space out.
But what is it really that I want to tell you.
I want to tell you how sorry I am. I want to tell you how sorry I am for not being able to catch up with you the past few days, months or years. Although reconnecting is merely talking, It has been so difficult to reconnect with people due to everything life has been throwing at us, but it’s not impossible and I could have done it, but I didn’t. So I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t exert as much effort as I could have. But it’s not too late. I want us to catch up. Get to know each other as if we never met. I want to know what you like. I want to know what you keep yourself busy with. I want to know everything about you – your new favourite food, colour and more.
Don’t ever think that I forgot about you or about all the memories that we created together because I didn’t. I will engrave them in my heart and my mind forever. No matter where we are this very second, I want you to know that I’m thinking about you. And I’m thinking about our memories together. Sometimes I smile in the middle of a boring class when I remember the stupid things we did together. In fact, I love talking about them with my university friends. Our memories are big parts of my life and i’m glad i can talk about them even in the future, with my future children and grandchildren. I only wish everyone had as much amazing memories as we did. Because we really did – we laughed, we cried, we inspired each other and we grew up together.
I can’t even begin to express how much I miss them. And how much I miss you.
That’s all i want to say, I just want to reach out to you again. I want us to reach out to each other once again. I don’t want you to simply be a memory; I want you to be my bridesmaid, be great titas (aunts) of each other’s children and talk about how sore our bones or bodies are when we become lolas (grandmothers).
We went through so much together. And we made so much memories together. But those memories were only the beginning of so many more. Not many are blessed with this kind of friendship so while we have the time, let’s not waste it.